Death and funerals are a time of complicated emotions, for some it is a time filled with grief, for others it starts with confusion, but for most it’s a time with immense sadness regardless of their relationship. One of the major questions when the topic of the funeral arises is whether or not you should attend the funeral. There are a few factors to consider when you are deciding to attend the funeral; whether or not it is family only and also your relationship with the deceased. Within this article we will take a look at these two factors to help you through this decision.

Family Only

In some cases the service may be listed as family only, if you are not family it is important to respect their wishes for the service. If you are not immediate family there are different things that you can do to offer your condolences to the family, a simple phone call may help or you can even organize your own memorial service with their friends that could not attend the service. However, if you have had a special invitation to the service by the immediate family, they view it as important that you should attend the service.

Relationship with the Deceased

In some cases, you may have had a very close relationship with the deceased but had a falling out and don’t know if it would be appropriate to attend the service. The first question to ask yourself is whether your presence will make others uncomfortable. If your falling out was something that others are aware off and will questions your intentions of being at the service, it may not be appropriate for you attend the service. Remember that the service is most importantly a time for the immediate family to grieve and focus on the deceased. Another time this question comes up is for ex-spouses of the deceased. If you ended on amicable terms with them, and still have a close connection with their family, then being at the service would be a great sign of respect.

If you have any further questions on this topic, please contact us at Charles J O’Shea Funeral Home.